Another one bites the dust...

Good Riddance... True friends are hard to come by, and when you have them, nourish your relationship with love and kindness, acceptance and most of all, friendship is a no-judgement zone, free of envious and selfish intentions, a place where no matter how much your friend shines if she's truly special to you, you'll love being in her presence without feeling out-shined. 
Yes, I've been in rehab for binge drinking and not being kind to myself, and in the psych ward when I needed help with depression, but this makes me stronger and able to look at people for who they are, without judgement, and see their tru colors, or if they are fake and pretentious, forgetting where they come from and bulldozing others who have always been there when they ask for help, regardless of how small or ugly or old my house is, it has always been open.
I am strong, beautiful, secure of myself, educated, honest, straight forward, LOVING and LOVABLE. My true friends are able to see me as such, don't judge me and encourage my ideas and personal choices no matter what.
As for you, you know who you are: For over eight years I tried to be your friend, opened the doors of my home and my heart, was always there whenever you called, encouraged your ideas and was always myself, never up or down, just me, you judged and criticized, weren't willing to help when I needed you during my citizenship process, and treated me like crap.
God bless you, truly, may you find and keep the happiness you boast to have and the material wealth you long to possess. May your thoughts and life be truly full of the peace you brag about and full of the awesomeness that surrounds you. I hope you face your demons soon so that the need to steal other people's ideas and greed don't propel you into action. Keep faking til you make it!

Stay at home mom, a lesson learned?

So I win the stupidest woman of the week award for sure…turns out I let my guard down and purchased a case of "high quality" beef and "premium" seafood from a couple of door-to-door salesmen lastnight.

"Medi’s Meats" in Sioux Falls prices the beef case for $299 and the seafood for $299, I paid $390 for both…ugh. Also, although Medi’s Meats is a licensed business, their drivers might not be. My gut told me the guys looked like they just walked out of prison, and I was probably right, the one Daniel guy looked like a drug addict as well.

I guess I can keep googling until my eyes pop out of my head but I will drop the issue because all I’ve found is:

-Turns out that most of these “salesmen” are drug addicts, and since they “get paid daily” they’re just looking for their next score. Sure enough, they cashed my check right away!

-repackaged meats

-ecoli burgers

-water and flavor pumped meat

-expired meats

And the list goes on… Like I said, Medi’s Meats is a licensed and registered business in Sioux Falls, unlike those I’ve found on the google searches, so I’m just praying that their product isn’t tainted. Although I did pay $141 less that what the stuff was “retailed” for, I still feel like an idiot as I actually thought I got a good deal getting beef and seafood for $2.94/serving, I just hope the meat doesn’t make us sick, since we already ate some of it (being Fat Tuesday and Lent beginning today and all).

What makes me feel the stupidest is that I actually let them inside my home, while I was alone with my sweet baby girl, what an IDIOT! And they were offering to help me “find room” in our freezer downstairs, they were checking everything out and I did not feel safe, if I were my husband I would have yelled at me for hours! But he didn’t, he’s a “stuffer”, and now I’m left with this huge guilt from first of all putting my baby and myself in danger; secondly, spending that ridiculous amount of money for which we have other priorities and I should have discussed with my husband first, AND I was bamboozled because I did NOT get a good deal, I was ripped off, considering the prices were not $418/case but a still questionable $299; and lastly, buying something that may not be safe for our consumption and now I feel like we shouldn’t eat any of it.

Please somebody help me, I’m trying to not beat myself down as much but I can’t seem to get a grip.